This Week in Death brings you: Our return to general swim! Get your beach balls inflated and your swim trunks on. Jump in so we can catch you up on the veritable ocean of news you need to know to be an educated death pool competitor. Don't forget to bring a towel! Oh, and put on some sunscreen, we don't want you to end up in here. Death Pool has just been handed an urgent news story and it needs all of you to stop what your doing and listen... Cannonball!
I'm a Health nut, and with no deaths this week, it's cashew to start...
Born Survivor Grylled over Whereabouts: Can't Bear Outdoors
Discovery Channel is re-evaluating one of its most popular series, "Man vs. Wild," after allegations surfaced that its survival-expert host was bunking in motels when he was supposed to be braving the great outdoors.The network issued a statement Monday in response to an investigation launched by British television network Channel 4, which carries the program under the title "Born Survivor: Bear Grylls." Channel 4 confirmed that host Bear Grylls had partaken of indoor accommodations on at least two occasions when his series had depicted him spending the night in the wild.
http://www.reuters.com/article
ok, so this mite not in actual qualfy to be a real like health update but we thoght u should knpow whats up
Courtney Love is planning more corrective surgery to fix her "wonky" lips.In a bizarre posting on her MySpace page, the former Hole singer revealed she is still unhappy with her looks, despite having surgery to remove her breast implants and alter her cosmetically enhanced lips.Courtney wrote: "my mouth still looks wonky, i think i gott go back to paris tot he dr, hes nit a cosmetic surgeon he just fixes bad surgery and also cleft palates and serious s--- its nbot really vanity hes conservtive, wich we like, and this really isnt znyones business but im hating that id di that to my mouth back in the day and he didnt really take out enough the first time around i just wnt the mouth god gave me back, it was perfectly cute."
http://www.londonnet.co.uk
Maradona Putting the Go, but not the Die, in Diego
After recovering from his alcohol addiction Argentine football legend Diego Maradona will return to the football field to participate with friends in a match of "showball" against Uruguay on the fifth of August in Santa Fe, Argentina. Maradona, who has a history of health problems related to drug and alcohol abuse, will return to the football field after being given the thumbs up. Maradona, who will turn 47 in October, has not been seen exercising since leaving the clinic more than two months ago. But he has already affirmed to the press that he will be in good shape for the match.
http://goal.com/en/Articolo
Munchkin Coroner Is "Really, Most Sincerely Alive," Will Leave Tiny Handprints in Hollywood Sidewalk
The Munchkins are finally getting their due. The 124 little people from the 1939 movie "Wizard of Oz" are slated to get a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame next year. That's good news to 91-year-old Meinhardt Raabe (RAH'-bee). He played the Munchkin coroner, who proclaimed the Wicked Witch of the East "really, most sincerely dead." He says he never tires of Munchkin fame. The four-foot-seven Raabe lives in Florida, but he says he'll be at the star dedication ceremony.
http://www.kbsd6.com/Global
Oh, death, you slay me...
Failed to Heed Warning: Danger, Bill Robinson!
Bill Robinson, who played on Pittsburgh's 1979 World Series championship team and was working as the Los Angeles Dodgers' minor league hitting coordinator, died Sunday. He was 64. "Bill was a wonderful family man and a great baseball player, coach, manager and friend to everyone he met," Dodger general manager Ned Colletti said. "Even though he never played for the Dodgers, it was an honor that he chose to be a part of the organization. Everyone he came into contact with was better for having known him."
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb
Death Imitates Art: Checkmate, Bergman
Swedish director Ingmar Bergman, an iconoclastic filmmaker widely regarded as one of the great masters of modern cinema, died Monday, the president of his foundation said. He was 89. "It's an unbelievable loss for Sweden, but even more so internationally," Astrid Soderbergh Widding, president of The Ingmar Bergman Foundation. He was "probably the greatest film artist, all things considered, since the invention of the motion picture camera," Woody Allen said in a 70th birthday tribute in 1988. "The Seventh Seal," released in 1957, riveted critics and audiences. An allegorical tale of the medieval Black Plague years, it contains one of cinema's most famous scenes -- a knight playing chess with the shrouded figure of Death.
http://www.cnn.com/2007
Prosser's Demon Deacons Got the Best of Him
Skip Prosser, who led Wake Forest to its first basketball No. 1 ranking three seasons ago, died Thursday of an apparent heart attack, the university said. He was 56. Prosser was found slumped on his office couch and unresponsive by the director of basketball operations, Mike Muse, shortly after returning from his noon jog, the athletics director, Ron Wellman, said.
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07
This Is a Story About a Woman Named Odile Crick, She Was Not Saved by Her Wristwatch
Odile Crick, an artist whose original sketch of the double helix of DNA, the genetic blueprint for life, became a symbol of modern molecular biology, died July 5 at her home in La Jolla, Calif. She was 86.The cause was cancer, said her stepson, Michael Crick, who said the family had not announced Mrs. Crick's death until last week.
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07
No Tomorrow for Snyder, so Fire up a Colortini, Sit Back, Relax, and Watch Tom Snyder, now, as he Flies through the Air towards Heaven
Talk show host Tom Snyder, whose smoke-filled interviews were a staple of late night television, has died after a struggle with leukemia. He was 71. Known for his improvised, casual style and robust laughter, Snyder conducted a number of memorable interviews as host of NBC's "The Tomorrow Show." Among his guests were John Lennon, Charles Manson and Johnny Rotten of the Sex Pistols. His catch phrase for the show was: "Fire up a colortini, sit back, relax, and watch the pictures, now, as they fly through the air." Snyder smoked throughout his show, the cigarette cloud swirling around him during interviews.
http://www.cnn.com/2007
Back by popular demand, the Commissioner's Council proudly brings you "Skinny Dipping," a weekly glance at some of the goings-on in the Pool. Columns will feature a more in-depth look at some of the squads and picks. To comment on this feature, or suggest an idea for "Skinny Dipping," feel free to send an email our way.
Three weeks ago in this space, Skinny Dipping told you about the 5 most popular picks, 2 of whom have since passed on. But where's the skinny (pun intended) on the opposite end of this Death spectrum, the least-popular picks? Well, here's the deal: there were 165 picks (58% of the entire pool) that qualify as "solo shots"; a death by one of the 165 would reward its owner with 20 points. Why such a large number? For starters, 30 different people are bound to come up with many different names. In many cases, these picks are unique because they are either young, in good health, or both, and were only chosen due to total guesswork, or, in some cases, spiteful hope. In other cases, however, thorough research can produce rewarding picks. To wit: 11 of the 26 points-related deaths this year have been solo shots, providing 220 out of the 670 awarded points to this point.
After two weeks of borderline chaos - chaos! - in the Top 5, this week there were no changes and the leaders remain...
1. El Esta Adead - 66 points (5 deaths)
2. The Ex-Parrots - 58.5 points (5 deaths)
3. Yiz-score - 54.3 points (4 deaths)
4. Die Hard - 46 points (3 deaths)
5. Kraut's Picks - 44.8 points (5 deaths)
That's all for us. Don't forget to tip your waitress.
The Commissioner's Council
Monday, July 30, 2007
TWID - National Cheesecake Day Edition
Monday, July 23, 2007
TWID - Cleveland Day Edition
This Week in Death brings you: Another week of instructional swim! No need to protest, just come on down to poolside as we review the basics of Death Pool. Feel free to review the crawl, back, breast or butterfly stroke from end to end as we catch you up on all the news you need to know to be an educated death pool competitor. And if you still need a kick board, don't be embarrassed, we'll show you how to blow bubbles in the water. General swim returns next week...
And behind every shady deal, behind every dollar earned... there was God, keeping the books. "Three deposits this week: Tammy Faye Messner, Mohammad Zahir Shah, and Rollie Stiles. Night drop, like always..." Time to get God's stuff down to laundry. They better not over-starch his shirts.
The first health is the deepest, baby I know...
He's Wanted, WAAAAAAAANTED, Dead or Alive
Osama bin Laden, like Mark Twain, may complain that rumors of his demise have been greatly exaggerated. Assuming, of course, that he is still alive. Many believe him to have died. There has been no news of bin Laden in more than a year. But a new video released over this past weekend on an Islamist Internet Web site shows the chief of al-Qaida looking very much alive, much to the delight of his supporters and to the great consternation of many others.
http://www.upi.com/Internationa
Johnson's Stroke of Genius: Return to Floor as Strom Thurmond
South Dakota Sen. Tim Johnson hopes to be back on the floor of the U.S. Senate sometime in September, former Senate Democratic leader Tom Daschle said Monday. Johnson continues his recovery from a brain hemorrhage last December that required surgery and left him with stroke-like effects. He has limited use of his right arm and hand and lingering problems with speech and walking.
http://www.rapidcityjournal
Will Willie's Weed Turn Him Into a Half Nelson?
The Red-Headed Stranger might want to change his nickname to No-Show Nelson. Willie Nelson has postponed a show at Memorial Hall that had been scheduled for Tuesday, July 31. Nelson canceled a September 2002 show in Neosho with Wynnona Judd the day before the performance. "His official story was that the cancellation was due to health reasons," said Mark Norris, one of the promoters for that show with Joplin's Access Entertainment. "Willie is happy, and he is healthy and works harder than anyone I know," Elaine Schock told CMT. "It doesn't seem unreasonable to need or want a couple of weeks off, especially when your life is planned a year in advance."
http://www.joplinglobe.com
Pan-Am Games to Fidel: "No Pills for You!"
Fidel Castro has become so glued to the television set watching the Pan American Games unfolding in Brazil that he is forgetting to take his pills. In a column published Wednesday by Cuba's Communist Party newspaper Granma, the convalescing Cuban leader said he was so engrossed with the sports that he was even forgetting to eat.
http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD
But when it comes to being dead, she's first. That's how I know....
Despite All Her Age, She Still Worked with Rats in a Cage
Anne McLaren, a leading developmental biologist and expert on the embryo who in the 1950s conducted experiments on mice that were important in the development of human in vitro fertilization, died on July 7 in Britain. She was 80. Throughout her career, Dr. McLaren delved ever deeper into biological as well as ethical questions of reproduction and what she termed "everything involved in getting from one generation to the next."
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07
Matchbox Man Unwell from Disease; Can't Avoid Bright Lights. That Must be Lonely
Jack Odell, a self-trained engineer whose daughter's mischievous habit of taking spiders to school in a matchbox prompted him to make her a tiny steamroller as a substitute — an invention that led to Matchbox Toys, maker of 3 billion Lilliputian vehicles in 12,000 models — died on July 7 in London. He was 87.By 1962, he told The New York Times in an interview, Matchbox was knocking out a million toy automobiles a week, more than the number of real ones made by all the world's major automakers combined. "In my obituary," Mr. Odell said in 1969 as quoted by The Daily Telegraph, "I want it said I was a damn good engineer."
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07
The Graff Clearly Shows Her Performance is Dying
M. M. Graff, a self-trained master gardener who became a New York legend by nudging, nagging and scolding — but seldom sweet-talking — in her crusade to improve the city parks she loved almost as much as she loathed her given name, Mildred, died at her home in Brooklyn on July 9. She was 97.In an interview with The New York Times Magazine in 1967, Ms. Graff did concede that a garden might not have to be perfect to be nice. She quickly added, "It just does for me."
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07
Everything Comes Down to Pooh
Shirley Slesinger Lasswell, who licensed rights to the Winnie the Pooh characters to Walt Disney in 1961, then later sued the company over disputed royalties, died Thursday. She was 84. She had been working on developing Pooh for television when she met Walt Disney, who wanted to create TV shows for the characters. She licensed Pooh to Disney in 1961. In 1991, Stephen Slesinger Inc. sued Disney, alleging the company miscalculated royalties due under that deal.
http://www.iht.com/articles/ap
When The Other Guy called him the Other Guy, Well, That was the Straw that broke the Tenor's Head
The American operatic tenor Jerry Hadley noted for his bright lyric voice, lively acting and adventurous choice of repertory, died today in Poughkeepsie, N.Y. He was 55. Friends and colleagues said Mr. Hadley had suffered from severe depression and had had financial difficulties, troubled personal relationships and professional setbacks. He had been on life support at a Poughkeepsie hospital since July 10, when he shot himself in the head with an air rifle, causing severe brain damage, at a house in Clinton Corners, N.Y.
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/07
Back by popular demand, t he Commissioner's Council proudly brings you "Skinny Dipping," a weekly glance at some of the goings-on in the Pool. Columns will feature a more in-depth look at some of the squads and picks. To comment on this feature, or suggest an idea for "Skinny Dipping," feel free to send an email our way.
Surely you've noticed that after today, 204 days will have passed in the year, and assuming everybody else in the Pool survives the day (though there are certainly no guarantees - it's been busy around these parts the last few days!) the total number of point-scoring deaths to this point will be 26. 283 names were picked at the start of the year, meaning 9% of the Pool has passed on. At any rate, when the year began, the question was asked, "what would happen if every one of the 283 died? All points are awarded. Who would win?" The answer is Yiz-Score would, with 321.8 points, in no small part due to 11 solo shots. Behind Yiz-Score would be The Tomb Raiders (317.3), and rounding out the top 5, Beating a Dead Horse (298.6), The Rev. Isaac Bruce (293.8), and Acharei Mos Kedoshim Emor (291.6). These 5 are the leaders in the "maximum points potential category," meaning that they have the potential to score more points than than anyone else. How are they actually doing? Well, Yiz-Score is in 3rd, and Beating a Dead Horse is doing alright. Meanwhile, despite their huge potential point totals, the other three make up 50% of the teams stuck at zero. Guess Professor Dumbledore was right: It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
Another week, another adjustment!... With a 20-point solo shot, Kraut's Picks knocks Go to Hell out of the Top 5 after a mere one-week stay. Sorry, Go to Hell. We hope your next visit to the Top 5 is long enough to allow you to unpack.
1. El Esta Adead - 66 points (5 deaths)
2. The Ex-Parrots - 58.5 points (5 deaths)
3. Yiz-score - 54.3 points (4 deaths)
4. Die Hard - 46 points (3 deaths)
5. Kraut's Picks - 44.8 points (5 deaths)
Don't let the heat drag you down, cool down with a dip in the death pool... an instructional dip, of course.
The Commissioner's Council
Monday, July 16, 2007
TWID - National Ice Cream Day Edition
This Week in Death brings you: Notes from instructional swim! Come on down to poolside as we review the basics of Death Pool. Feel free to try the crawl, back, breast or butterfly stroke from end to end as we catch you up on all the news you need to know to be an educated death pool competitor. And if you need a kick board, don't be embarrassed, we'll show you how to blow bubbles in the water. General swim returns shortly...
This week brought the passing of two of our most popular members: Charles Lane and Lady Bird Johnson... We'll miss you both very much, and don't worry; we are not fighting over the inheritance. We have divvied up the points fairly.
For better health updates, eat organic....
Diller in a Pickle; Tough to Get Out of it With Strained Back
ET has learned Phyllis Diller did not break her back as earlier reports indicated. She actually fractured a disk in her back while at home. She said it happened after she twisted and turned, and the resulting injury turned out to be a fractured disk in her back. She tells ET that she's going to try and take it easy and let everything heal.
http://www.etonline.com
"It's Better to be Pissed Off, then Pissed On!" You know what I mean, Grylls! Um Bear, What Are You Doing in This Video???
"That is probably the most disgusting thing i have seen a hot guy do!" - Speedergurl
"He is my hero. For peeing on his shirt and wearing it on his head to keep cool. In the desert" - Randale87
No Word If Pavarotti is Fighting More Like Nala or Simba (or Kitna)
Luciano Pavarotti is "fighting like a lion" against his pancreatic cancer and is reacting well to radiotherapy, his wife told an Italian newspaper. "I can now say he is doing well," Nicoletta Mantovani said in an interview published Wednesday in the Italian daily La Stampa. "He's determined and results are encouraging," she said. "Despite the heavy treatment he has not lost weight, which by the way he would have liked, or his hair."
http://www.washingtonpost.com
Flatley Mysteriously Flirting with Flat-lining?
Dance star Michael Flatley has enlisted a team of doctors find a cure for the mystery immune virus that left him fighting for his life last December (06). Flatley was taken ill while rehearsing for Celtic Tiger, his latest show. The mystery virus left him hospitalised for weeks, amid reports it might rob him of the ability to dance.
http://www.postchronicle.com
You know what? Charles Lane and Lady Bird don't get all the death attention this week...
Should have Shagged Now; No More Shag Later
Longtime major league umpire Shag Crawford, patriarch of a family of prominent sports officials, died Wednesday. He was 90. Jerry Crawford said his father died at an assisted living facility in suburban Philadelphia. "For someone who was going to be 91 in August, he was in pretty good health for a long time," Crawford said by telephone. Jerry Crawford became a big league umpire in the mid-1970s, around the time his brother, Joey, became an NBA official.
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb
Sadly, There Was No Fluffer on Hand to Keep Him Going
Jim Mitchell, who teamed with his brother, Artie, to build a legendary porn empire that included San Francisco's O'Farrell Theatre and several revolutionary skin flicks -- and who in 1991 shot his brother dead -- died Thursday night at his Sonoma County ranch home, family and coroner's officials said. He was 63. "He was sitting in his chair and doing something, I think watching TV, and he just, 'Ehhhh.' That was it. His heart quit him just like that," said Merle Lane, a relative by marriage.
http://www.mercurynews.com
Kudzu Creator Crashes. Have to Wonder What the Last Thought Bubble Through His Head Was...
Doug Marlette, the North Carolina-born cartoonist who won a Pulitzer Prize and created the popular strip "Kudzu," was killed in a car accident Tuesday morning in Mississippi, authorities said. He was 57. Marlette was the passenger in the car, which struck a tree after skidding on a rain-slicked road, said John Garrison, the coroner in Mississippi's Marshall County.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap
Larry Can't Stave off Illness; Should've Tried Indiana Pace-maker
Larry Staverman, who was the first coach of the Indian Pacers when they started as an ABA franchise, died Wednesday after a long illness. He was 70. "By being our first coach, he was a believer in the franchise at a time when there were many doubters," Pacers CEO Donnie Walsh said in a statement. "That is something we recognize and hope our fans recognize. Our condolences go to his family and friends."
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap
Back with popular demand, the Commissioner's Council proudly brings you "Skinny Dipping," a weekly glance at some of the goings-on in the Pool. Columns will feature a more in-depth look at some of the squads and picks. To comment on this feature, or suggest an idea for "Skinny Dipping," feel free to send an email our way.
Last week also introduced the "Skinny Dipping Curse." Skinny Dipping boasted of the continued living of both Charles Lane and Lady Bird Johnson, only to see both perish. Who will skinny dipping curse this week? Find out... right now.
While most weeks this space will be used to take a look at some of the more trivia-related aspects of Death Pool, be it the entries in the Pool, or the names that appear on those entries, a week like this, with 22 point additions to 15 teams (7 teams double-dipped this week!), forces a look at the entire depth of the pool. 10 teams began the week with no points recorded; the passing of two popular picks, Charles Lane and Lady Bird Johnson, shrank that number by 4. Incredibly, three teams (Satan's Waiting Room , Grateful I'm Not Dead, and Hagler's Rolls) broke their shutout on Tuesday and got their second score on Wednesday. One team (Anybody But Me) only had Johnson. When the dust cleared, 6 teams remain points-less; in better news, they still have 168 3/8 days left to get on the board!
The Leaders Remain... No, wait! We have an adjustment! Repeat, an adjustment! With her 5.5 point increase this week, Go to Hell has now cracked the Top Sorry, Av S. Is My Hero - better luck this week.
1. El Esta Adead - 66 points (5 deaths)
2. The Ex-Parrots - 58.5 points (5 deaths)
3. Yiz-score - 50 points (3 deaths)
4. Die Hard - 46 points (3 deaths)
5. Go to Hell - 43 points (5 deaths)
Don't let the heat drag you down, cool down with a dip in the death pool... an instructional dip, of course.
The Commissioner's Council
Monday, July 9, 2007
TWID - All Star Break Edition
This Week in Death brings you: Notes from the game of pool! We've set up the balls in the rack and chalked up the cues. Join us as we go solids versus stripes, and catch you up on all the news you need to know to be a Fats Domino-like death pool competitor. Watch out for the 8-Ball, like death... it's an end. Unlike death, it doesn't give you any points.
If you don't have your health update, you have no update.
Some Lady Birds Weren't Meant to be Caged
Lady Bird Johnson, the former first lady, was released from the hospital Thursday and was resting comfortably at her home, a family spokesman said. Johnson, 94, was admitted to Seton Medical Center a week ago and treated for a low-grade fever. She remained at the hospital for observation after the fever subsided.
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0
Richie Now Eating For One
In Touch Weekly magazine and TMZ.com are confirming rumors that "Simple Life" star Nicole Richie is pregnant. An unidentified friend says Richie was planning on withholding the news until she was at least three months pregnant.
http://www.13wham.com/news
Look Who Knows So Much? Just So Happens that Your Father Here Is Only Mostly Dead
Italian opera sensation Luciano Pavarotti will release a new album of classical religious music, despite battling cancer. The tenor has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and his weight has dropped dramatically since undergoing a recent operation to remove a tumour. But despite his ill health, the 71-year-old still plans to release an album of sacred songs. The news of the new project follows reports of Pavarotti's daughter claiming the singer "knows he's going to die soon" - a statement which has been disputed by Robson.
http://www.pr-inside.com
Notorious B.I.G.G.S.? Every Move He Makes, We'll Be Watching Him
Ronnie Biggs, one of the masterminds of Britain's Great Train Robbery in 1963, has been transferred to a lower security jail because of his ailing health and advancing years, media said Wednesday. The 77-year-old, who is partially paralysed and can barely speak after suffering several strokes, has been moved from Belmarsh high security jail in south-east London to a prison for elderly inmates in Norwich, eastern England. http://www.khaleejtimes.com
What's that you say? Death Gordon is approaching?
Down and Out Is Beverly Sills
Beverly Sills, the Brooklyn-born opera diva who was a global icon of can-do American culture with her dazzling voice, bubbly personality and management moxie in the arts world, died Monday of cancer, her manager said. She was 78.
http://www.cnn.com/2007
This Boots was Made for Walking, But That's Not What He'll Do
Boots Randolph, whose spirited saxophone playing on "Yakety Sax" endeared him to fans for years on Benny Hill's TV show, died Tuesday. He was 80. Randolph played regularly in Nashville nightclubs for 30 years, becoming a tourist draw for the city much like Wayne Newton in Las Vegas and Pete Fountain in New Orleans.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap
Yabba Dabba Dead!
Will H. Schaefer, a composer whose music accompanied hit television shows such as "I Dream of Jeannie" and "The Flintstones," has died in California, a family friend said Wednesday. He was 78. The Wisconsin-native wrote background music, which is different from theme songs, for such TV shows as "The Flying Nun," "Hogan's Heroes," "The AristoCats," "The Jetsons," "The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie" and "The Tonight Show" with Johnny Carson.
http://www.variety.com/article
Walker's Lung Cancer as Deadly as Dy-no-mite!
Former Providence great Jimmy Walker, the only player from a New England college to be selected with the first pick in the NBA draft, died Monday of lung cancer in Kansas City, Mo. He was 63. In three seasons at Providence, Walker averaged 25.2 points per game and scored a total of 2,045, a school record that stood for 38 years.
http://sports.espn.go.com/ncb
Shekhar-a's Truth-Telling Hips Laid to Rest
Former Prime Minister Chandra Shekhar died of cancer on Sunday in New Delhi at the age of 80, a hospital statement said. Chandra Shekhar, who headed a coalition government as India's 11th prime minister from 1990 to 1991, was a socialist politician from Uttar Pradesh.
http://in.today.reuters.com
26 editions of TWID down, and this edition marks the first of 26 to go. To mark this occasion, the Commissioner's Council proudly introduces "Skinny Dipping," a weekly glance at some of the goings-on in the Pool. Columns will feature a more in-depth look at some of the squads and picks. To comment on this feature, or suggest an idea for "Skinny Dipping," feel free to send an email our way. Without further ado...
Entering 2007, it seemed like using a spot on the roster for Fidel Castro would be a wise choice. Halfway through the year, however, it's been looking like Milk. Castro, who came into the year in poor health, was selected by 17 of the 30 teams. Socialite Brooke Astor, who turned 105 recently, was the 2nd-most popular pick, appearing on 13 rosters. Fellow centenarian Charles Lane came in 3rd, with 12 rosters forecasting his demise. Rounding out the Top 5 are Albert Hofmann (a vibrant 101-year old) and subject of many a health update Lady Bird Johnson, each having been selected 10 times. What do they all have in common (besides, you know, being really old)? Well, halfway through the year, none of them have put points on the board. In fact, none of the 18 picks at the top of the frequency list have passed on. Maybe Agent Kay was right after all: A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it... The most popular picks to be a source of points have been Kitty Carlisle and Maurice Papon, with each being selected by 5 people.
Don't forget to bring a scoring update!
1. El Esta Adead - 66 points (5 deaths)
2. The Ex-Parrots - 58.5 points (5 deaths)
3. Yiz-score - 50 points (3 deaths)
4. Die Hard - 46 points (3 deaths)
5. Av S. is My Hero - 41 points (3 deaths)
Don't let the heat drag you down, cool down with a dip in the death pool...
The Commissioner's Council
Monday, July 2, 2007
TWID - Independence Day Edition
Health is a wonderful thing. Health is a really good thing. Get off your ealth, let's do some health...
More Cowbell Reduces Fever. Healthy Enough Not to Be in Gold Plated Diapers
Former first lady Lady Bird Johnson, 94, left an Austin, Texas, hospital on Thursday following six days of tests and observation. The widow of late President Lyndon Johnson was suffering from a low-grade fever when she was admitted on June 22 to Seton Medical Center in Austin.
http://www.reuters.com/article
A Big No No: Zsa Zsa Has Boo Boo
During Friday's hearing, Zsa Zsa Gabor was absent due to a leg infection. It occurred when she slipped and fell while trying to get out of bed without assistance. "She has got a strong antibiotic for the infection," says Prince Frederic. "We hope the infection is going to go away. If it doesn't, she has to go to the hospital."
http://www.etonline.com
Bush's Christmas List: I Wanna Pony, a Nintendo Wii, and the Death of a Dictator
President Bush on Thursday openly anticipated the death of ailing Cuban President Fidel Castro, picturing it as an opportunity to bring freedom to the Caribbean island after nearly half a century of iron-fisted rule by the fiery communist leader."One day, the good Lord will take Fidel Castro away," Bush said.
http://www.washingtonpost.com
The Second Line on the Headstone is "Until I Turned 90. Being Old Sucks."
When Brooke Astor dies, she wants the world to know "I had a wonderful life." The 105-year-old doyenne of New York society has chosen those words for her headstone, according to a published report. Astor is in frail but stable health, people who have seen her told the Daily News yesterday.
http://www.nydailynews.com
Until death do us part...
Liz Claiborne, founder of the fashion house that bears her name, died today at the age of 78. Claiborne, who retired from the day-to-day operations in 1989, founded the fashion house in 1976. The goal was to create a collection of fashions aimed at the growing number of women entering the workforce.
http://cbs2.com/topstories
Siegel Gives Death Two Thumbs Down
Surrounded by family and friends, ABC's beaming and insightful movie critic Joel Siegel has died in New York, after a long and remarkably courageous struggle with cancer, at the age of 63.
http://abcnews.go.com/GMA
Survived American Hurls: Atomic or Otherwise
Former Prime Minister Kiichi Miyazawa, whose career stretched from Japan's defeat in World War II through the 1990s "lost decade" of economic stagnation, died on Thursday at the age of 87, his office said. For some, Miyazawa's most enduring image was captured in 1992 when he cradled the head of U.S. President George Bush in his lap after Bush collapsed at a state banquet in Tokyo.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm
Everyone Mourned because They Assumed They Were Supposed to Get the Sadness
With the coming of July we have reached the halfway point of the Death Pool. In the immortal (no pun intended. Screw it. Pun very much intended.) word of John Bon Jovi "Whoooooooooooooooa we're halfway there, whooooooooooooooa living on a prayer." A prayer of health, death notices, and scoring updates. In honor of the halfway point, we reproduce for you: The Full Standings.
1. El Esta Adead- 66 points (5 deaths)
2. The Ex-Parrots- 58.5 points (5 deaths)
3. Yiz-score- 50 points (3 deaths)
4. Die Hard- 46 points (3 deaths)
5. Av S. is My Hero- 41 points (3 deaths)
6. Go to Hell- 37.5 points (3 deaths)
7. Future Corpses of America- 35 points (2 deaths)
8. Mine are the Deadest- 28.5 points (3 deaths)
9. Life's a Bitch- 25 points (2 deaths)
10. Hey Hey Hey Goodbye- 21 (2 deaths)
11. Beating a Dead Horse- 20 points (1 death)
11. Fatal Swimming Pool- 20 points (1 death)
13. Hagler's Picks - 15 points (1 death)
13. Kraut's Picks- 15 points (1 death)
13. Struck Down by Yahweh- 15 points (1 death)
13. The Death Eaters- 15 points (1 death)
17. Grave Danger- 13.5 points (2 deaths)
18. The Morgue the Merrier- 6 points (1 death)
18. Death is Funny- 6 points (1 death)
18. The Deathtrum- 6 points (1 death)
21. Satan's Waiting Room- 0 points
21. Grateful I'm not Dead- 0 points
21. No Research, Just Guts- 0 points
21. Hagler's Rolls- 0 points
21. Achrei Mos Kedoshim Emor- 0 points
21. Do not Resuscitate- 0 points
21. The Rev. Isaac Bruce- 0 points
21. My Twenty People- 0 points
21. The Tomb Raiders- 0 points
21. Anybody But Me- 0 points
Second Half Projections? Double Your Current Score.
