TWID - Fourth Quarter Edition

This Week in Death brings you up to date on the week's events from the glorious afterlife. While the soothing light at the end of the tunnel may be a distance away, you'll find here the relevant information to secure the emotional bond that connects man and his soon-to-be corpses. Two roads diverge in Hades but only one leads to the Death Cup.

1. Health News

Castro Latest to Come Out with Shocking Celebrity Life Tape; Claims it was Made for Personal Use
Fidel Castro looked alert and healthier during an hour-long interview taped and aired on Cuban television Friday, responding to rumors of his death with a defiant ``here I am.'' In the first video of the ailing 81-year-old revolutionary seen in more than three months, a pale Castro stayed seated the entire time, spoke slowly and softly and didn't always look the interviewer in the eye. But he appeared to be thinking clearly. Early in the interview, Castro often trailed off mid-sentence, and needed some prompting by the interviewer. He had bags under his eyes, sunken cheeks and his thin gray beard looked as wispy as ever. But he appeared to get stronger and more comfortable as time passed.
[Guardian]

He Meant Howie Mandel, Dana Perino Said
Nelson Mandela is still very much alive despite an embarrassing gaffe by U.S. President George W. Bush, who alluded to the former South African leader's death in an attempt to explain sectarian violence in Iraq. "It's out there. All we can do is reassure people, especially South Africans, that President Mandela is alive," Achmat Dangor, chief executive officer of the Nelson Mandela Foundation, said. References to his death -- Mandela is now 89 and increasingly frail -- are seen as insensitive in South Africa.
[Reuters]

Yankee Doodle - Not So Dandy
The son of Yankees owner George Steinbrenner has been elected as Chairman of the Board by the Yankees Board of Directors. That puts Hal Steinbrenner in line to one day run the team, something his father has done since the early 1970s. Hal Steinbrenner replaces Steve Swindall, who was removed as chairman after George Steinbrenner's daughter initiated divorce proceedings against him. The question of who would take over the team has been a major issue since the elder Steinbrenner's health has been in question recently.
[New York 1]

If Fawcett Leaves Earth Cast, Rumored to be Replaced by Cheryl Ladd
Former Charlie's Angels star Farrah Fawcett has suffered a relapse in her battle against cancer and plans to pursue alternative treatments in Germany, a celebrity magazine reports. "She is in Germany for therapy. She is getting informed about several treatment methods that would be possible for her," Kathrin Collins, a spokeswoman for the 60-year-old icon of the hit 1970s television series, told Germany's weekly Bunte which hits newsstands tomorrow. Bunte reported cancerous cells reappeared in her colon in May.
[The Age]

2. Death News

Benadryl Inventor Finds Death Relieves Allergy and Cold Symptoms
George Rieveschl, a chemical engineer (not a medical doctor) whom millions of sufferers of allergies, colds, rashes, hives and hay fever can thank for the relief they receive by swallowing a capsule of beta-dimethylaminoethylbenzhydryl ether hydrochloride — the antihistamine he invented and renamed Benadryl — died Thursday in Cincinnati. He was 91 and lived in Covington, Ky. The cause was pneumonia, his wife, Ellen, said.
[New York Times]

Overtime of Wirtz's Life Ends in Sudden Death
William Wirtz, the longtime owner of the Chicago Blackhawks notorious for driving a hard bargain, died Wednesday at age 77. In an announcement on the team Web site, the Blackhawks said Wirtz died at Evanston Hospital after battling cancer. Wirtz was chairman of the Board of Governors of the National Hockey League for 18 years and helped negotiate the merger of the NHL and the World Hockey Association in the late 1970's. Wirtz's stewardship of the Blackhawks was long questioned, with the criticism becoming more vociferous in recent years. Many fans blamed him for allowing too many good players to leave over the years, and for his refusal to televise most home games.
[ESPN]

Miss Moneypenny Only Lived Once, She Lived and was Let Die
Actress Lois Maxwell, who starred as Miss Moneypenny in a string of James Bond movies, has died aged 80. Maxwell starred in 14 Bond films as the secretary to M, the secret agent's boss and head of the secret service. She appeared in more movies than any of the actors who played the lead role in the spy series, including Sir Sean Connery and Sir Roger Moore. "I think it was a great disappointment to her that she had not been promoted to play M. She would have been a wonderful M."
[BBC]

Shapira Also Opposed Anatomical Concessions to Death
Rabbi Avraham Shapira, an Israeli Orthodox Jewish leader best known for urging soldiers to disobey orders to evacuate the Gaza Strip, died Thursday in Jerusalem. He was 94. Rabbi Shapira, a chief rabbi in Israel for 10 years beginning in 1983, spent much of his life fighting vigorously against territorial concessions to the Palestinians, emerging as one of the Jewish state's most divisive religious figures. In 2005, he called on observant soldiers to disobey orders to dismantle 21 Jewish settlements during Israel's withdrawal from Gaza that year. Rabbi Shapira also opposed the first Israeli-Palestinian peace accords in 1993, saying Jewish law forbade Israel from transferring holy land to the Palestinians.
[New York Times]

This Week Was Somebody's Birthday! Whose Birthday? Some Death Pool Entrants' Birthdays. How Old Are They? 1,2,3... And Never been Kissed By... Death
Happy Birthday to:
September 25: Colin Friels (55)
September 26: Emilio Navarro (102)
September 29: Jerry Lee Lewis (72)
September 30: Deborah Kerr (86)
October 1: Tom Bosley (80)
October 1: Jimmy Carter (83)
October 1: Grete Waitz (54)
... And Many More!!!!!!!!

We've entered the last quarter of the race. No points deaths this week means no change in the Top 5, who remain...
1. El Esta Adead - 76 points (6 deaths)
2. The Ex-Parrots - 62.3 points (6 deaths)
3. Kraut's Picks - 60.9 points (8 deaths)
4. Yiz-score - 54.3 points (4 deaths)
5. Struck Down by Yahweh - 53.6 points (6 deaths)

T-W-I-D And TWID Was Its Name-O,
The Commissioner's Council