Deathbed Confessions with Ike Turner

Musician Ike Turner has died at the age of 76. Cause of death is currently unknown.

Turner, whose role as one of rock's critical architects, was overshadowed by his ogrelike image as the man who brutally abused former wife and icon Tina Turner. Turner managed to rehabilitate his image somewhat in his later years, touring around the globe with his band the Kings of Rhythm and drawing critical acclaim for his work. He won a Grammy in 2007 in the traditional blues album category for "Risin' With the Blues."

In one of Turner's songs titled "Deathbed (Na Na Na)", Turner stated: "All I know is you'll be sorry/Sorry when i'm dead/Dead and gone/In a bitchin' blaze of glory/Holding a grudge can take a lifetime/And there's a lot that i got to say/I'll tell it to the world/On my deathbed/Someday/Na, na, na, na, na, na."

While there are no reports about what Turner ultimately said on his deathbed, he did tell The Independent in a 2005 interview, "I would say that I'm the guy that went all the way to the top, and then I've come all the way back down to the bottom again. And then bounced. And, like, today I can say that whatever I do from now, my life is great today."

Resurrection and recovery is always a possibility with this one.

[NBC Sandiego]
[The Independent]

Doesn't Say Anything About Avoiding Death Pools

Seinfeld warned us about the dangers of tractors. After all, we know Sophie's tractor story: she got gonorrhea from riding a tractor in her bathing suit.

But Tractors can be even more dangerous than transmitting STDs. This, according to the grand prize winning label of the 11th annual Wacky Warning Label Contest:

Grand Prize: A label on a small tractor that warns: "Danger: Avoid Death."

I'm sorry- Wacky Label? I think that's a very important label. I just wish this guy had seen it...

Alright, that's it for me. You've been great. Goodnight everybody.

[AP]
[ABC News]

Johnson is a Year Older, a Year Wiser, a Year Healthier

Last winter, South Dakota Senator Tim Johnson's life was in danger. A brain hemorrhage threatened to take his life from him. A year later though the senator is preparing to run for re-election.

He says doctors are amazed at his recovery, and they believe his speech and physical condition will continue to improve. The 60-year-old's speech is slurred but has improved noticeably since he returned to work in September. He walks around his home and office using a cane, and uses a scooter to travel long distances in the Capitol.

You stay healthy, South Dakota.

[The KREN Reno]

Ed Koch has Bob Barker's Birthday Exactly. Does He Win Both Showcases?

It was Bono who crooned " Where you live should not decide/ Whether you live or whether you die."

It was Lynne Cossman, Mississippi State research fellow, who wrote that "place" definitely has significance when scientifically examining mortality rates on the local and national level.

It was us who said that no matter where you live, as long as you are alive, we say "Happy Birthday!"

Today is somebody's birthday! Whose Birthday? ex-New York Mayor Ed Koch's Birthday. How Old Is He? 1,2,3,4... 83! And Never been Kissed By... Death

Koch appears on 1 2007 Death Pool roster and because we're throwing you this party, we leave you with a little goody bag-

• The mayor of New York in Ghostbusters, Ghostbusters II, and The Real Ghostbusters was supposed to resemble Koch in both appearance and attitude, and is even given the first name "Ed" in the film novelization by Richard Mueller.
  

Ray... If someone asks you if you're a mayor, you say... YES!

Today is somebody's birthday! Whose Birthday? Price is Right host retiree Bob Barker's Birthday. How Old Is He? 1,2,3,4... 84! And Never been Kissed By... Death

Barker appears on 8 2007 Death Pool rosters and because we're throwing you this party, we leave you with a little goody bag-

• Bob Barker is the oldest winner of any MTV award. In 1996, at the age of 73, Barker won the MTV Movie Award for Best Fight for his role in the Adam Sandler movie "Happy Gilmore."
  

I guess Barker has not "had enough... Bitch!"

... And Many More!

Can't Imagine How AP Got This Death Scoop

Rene J. Cappon, longtime editor for The Associated Press and the word master behind some of its best writers, died Sunday. He was 83.

The Viennese-born Cappon, known to colleagues as Jack, died Sunday in a nursing home in Port Washington, N.Y., said his wife, Susan. He died of what was believed to be natural causes. Over a half-century at the AP, Cappon held a variety of jobs: editor and reporter in Baltimore and Kansas City, Mo.; editor of AP NewsFeatures; writing coach; and general news editor when that was the top editorial position for the news cooperative. He retired in 2002.

Click the link above (or below, for that matter) for more info, including the nugget that "Of all languages, English was the one that seduced him." Oh, that English. Such a temptress. In the end, though, I think we all know she's just a tease.

[AP (Duh!)]

Long Live Th---... What's That? Oh. Um... Long Live Dr. Phil!

Assuming Merv Griffin started a TV company in the afterlife, it's probably safe to assume he'd hire Roger King. Yeah, that's King as in King World:

Roger M. King, the CBS and King World Productions executi
ve who helped bring stars including Oprah Winfrey, Alex Trebek and "Dr. Phil" McGraw to television, died Saturday of a stroke, a CBS spokesman said. He was 63.King was stricken at his home in Boca Raton, Fla., on Friday and died Saturday at a hospital, CBS spokesman Chris Ender told The Associated Press. At the time of his death King was chief executive officer of CBS Television Distribution. He joined the network in 2000 when his groundbreaking company, King World Productions, merged with CBS.

We encourage all TV viewers who watch Oprah, Jeopardy!, Wheel of Fortune, Dr. Phil, or syndicated reruns of Everybody Loves Raymond, CSI, Survivor, The Amazing Race, or America's Top Model, to take a moment to think about the man who made it all possible. OK, not if you're watching America's Top Model. You have other issues to work out.

[SF Gate]

Tombstones Go Digital; Nary a Sold

Want to leave a message for your relatives and friends from the grave? New technology allows for it through high-tech digital images powered by a solar cell. But it hasn't been received well by the public thus far.

The panel mounts to the front of the gravestone and pays tribute to the deceased in color pictures, words, music and even videos. It's all from a small memory chip inside a device that opens like the front cover of a book.

"I haven't sold any," said Doug Ellis of Riverview Monuments, who has been offering the so-called "serenity panel" system for about $2,000 since February.

Ellis, 54, said maybe 15 potential customers have spent time looking and listening to the gravestone player he displays in his store. One woman asked him to mail her pricing information. But nobody has been serious about buying one.

Despite poor sales numbers, this technology brings with it the chance to revolutionize the legacy that the deceased can leave behind.

"That is a big step, putting electronics on your headstone," Cheri Lucking said. "People are used to sandblasted, granite and marble and things like that."

Ways of honoring the dead are changing because of technology, Lucking said.

If Pavarotti was digitally alive today, we wonder what he'd sing.

[CNN]

Frances Reid to Kirk Douglas: 1 Degree of Separation

Some birthdays for you to celebrate, so you can stop wondering when some Mexican musician is going to go Antonio Banderas -Desperado all over everybody's ass.

Now, help yourself to a double heaping of cake, because...

Today is somebody's birthday! Whose Birthday? Actor Kirk Douglas's Birthday. How Old Is He? 1,2,3,4... 91! And Never been Kissed By... Death

Douglas appears on 9(!) 2007 Death Pool rosters and because we're throwing you this party, we leave you with a little goody bag-

• In the 2003 movie "It Runs in the Family," three generations of a fictional family are depicted by Kirk Douglas, Michael Douglas, and Cameron Douglas, real life grandfather, father, and son.

Douglas is still as determined as Spartacus though: "I'd do it! I'm still a young guy!" So says the sprightly Kirk Douglas when asked if he'd make another movie.

Today is somebody else's birthday! Whose Birthday? Actress Frances Reid's Birthday. How Old Is She? 1,2,3,4... 93! And Never been Kissed By... Death

Reid appears on 1 2007 Death Pool roster and because we're throwing you this party, we leave you with a little goody bag-

• Frances Reid has portrayed matriarch Alice Horton on Days of Our Lives since the series premiered in November 1965. 42 years later, she is still playing the same character!

To quote Catherine Deveny "Frances Reid is 93 years old and still plays the role of Alice Horton. Someone give that woman a medal. And some stewed prunes." I mean, she is no Helen Wagner, but that's pretty damn impressive.

... And Many More!

What's Going On With Lewis? Can He Shake It?

Singer Jerry Lee Lewis was set to take the stage tonight at Charleston Music Hall. Tickets cost between $75 and $225. Word has come down, however, that Lewis will not perform this evening.

Jerry Lee Lewis has postponed his show scheduled for 8 p.m. today because of sudden illness. The new date for the performance, which is a benefit for the MUSC Children's Hospital Fund, is Jan. 26 at 8 p.m. Tickets for today's show will be honored for the Jan. 26 performance.

As a small consolation for disappointed ticket holders, we offer this video of Lewis performing in 2004 with Kid Rock.

[The Post and Courier]

Furthering the Death of Classical Music

Karlheinz Stockhausen, whose electronic works made him one of the most important composers of the postwar era, has died at age 79. His avant-garde style made him world-renowned.

Stockhausen was considered by some an eccentric member of the European musical elite and by others a courageous pioneer in the field of new music. Rock and pop musicians such as John Lennon, Frank Zappa and David Bowie have cited him as an influence, and he is also credited with having influenced techno music.

Stockhausen sparked controversy in 2001, when he described the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks in the United States as "the greatest work of art one can imagine" during a news conference in the northern German city of Hamburg, where several of the suicide pilots had lived. The composer later apologized, but the city still canceled performances of his concerts.

Stockhausen's life ended on an innovative Andalusian cadence.

[Yahoo! News]

...And well. Out of hospital, back on set.

A short while ago, we stated that actor Eli Wallach had been hospitalized. No other details were reported.

It turns out he was there for a hip-replacement upgrade. He's since left Lenox Hill Hospital and gone to work on his newest movie.

"He's doing really well. He's sailing. They're calling him a medical miracle, because he defies all odds," said Wallach's daughter, Katherine.

From what we can tell, Wallach now has half of a hard-boiled egg, a green olive and a shoe horn keeping his midsection together.

[NY Post]

Eli Wallach, at 92: Still ugly but celebrating birthdays and alive...

"Those who live in glass houses shouldn't pee on them." It's a saying for a reason. On the brighter side, here is someone who was never killed for protesting urination:

Today is somebody's birthday! Whose Birthday? Actor Eli Wallach's Birthday. How Old Is He? 1,2,3,4... 92! And Never been Kissed By... Death

Wallach appears on 3 2007 Death Pool rosters and because we're throwing you this party, we leave you with a little goody bag-

• In 2006, Wallach made a guest appearance on "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip," playing a former writer on "The Philco Comedy Hour", a comedy show that aired on the fictional NBS network, who was blacklisted in the 1950s. Wallach earned a 2007 Emmy nomination for his work on the show.

If he earned an Emmy nomination for Studio 60... he must be something special. Happy Birthday!

... And Many More!

The Password(of-the-year) is "Sterbetourismus"

Good news! Switzerland has a new word of the year. It's... it's... sterbetourismus!

What does it mean, you ask? Don't feel bad, my original guesses were all wrong too. It is not any of the following:

1. The substance with which Barry Bonds injects himself in the ass
   
2. The next installment in "hilarious" Dane Cook TV shows
3. The sister of Abi Titmuss
4. Another Costanza invented variation of Christmas
   

What is sterbetourismus then? It can be loosely talented as "death tourism," and it's on the rise in Switzerland. You see, on the issue of assisted suicide, Switzerland is uncharacteristically not neutral:

Most Swiss support assisted suicide – in which the terminally ill have to carry out the final act themselves – but they are divided over whether the laws should apply to foreigners... The global spotlight had only turned to Switzerland's liberal laws on assisted suicide when the number of foreign "patients" increased.

To recap - the top word: Death Tourism; the top death tourist destination: Switzerland.

I don't know, to me - that is an upset. Had I guessed the top destination for dying people, I would have gone with "the ground."

[Swiss Info]

Nicole Richie Would Like to Have Gained These Pounds for a Reason

We here at BDPE tend to focus on death more than life. But once in awhile it's instructive to take a good look at life. Here's how life works: if I'm in a court-mandated anti-drinking problem and I don't feel well and want to leave, I'm probably out of luck. But then again, I probably wouldn't get 82 minutes in jail for a DUI either. As for famous people...

Mom-to-be Nicole Richie has been granted a leave of absence from her court-mandated anti-drinking program, her rep confirms to PEOPLE. The program suggested the Simple Life star take a leave because they were worried for her safety, according to her rep. "They offer that option to anyone with a medical condition of any kind," the rep says. "She is not receiving special treatment."

Granted, she is eight months pregnant, so she probably doesn't feel all that great. Then again, I doubt that fetus has been nourished enough to even have the energy to kick.

[People]

A Sweet Star Made Retire

Karl Malden, the 95 year old ex-Hollywood star of the 50's-70's who worked with such luminaries as Marlon Brando and won an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor for "A Streetcar Named Desire," is living peacefully in Los Angeles nowadays.

I have also cleverly culled the following facts:

• December 18th is Karl Malden's 69th wedding anniversary. Don't forget to send a card
  
• Karl Malden hit the winning shot to defeat Hammond High School to end the 1931 high school basketball season
• $3.49 was a good salary for a day of work in the 30's
• Karl Malden's real last name is Sekulovich
• Karl Malden's last acting appearance was in a 2000 episode "Take this Sabbath Day" of "The West Wing"
  
• There is no chin under Karl Malden's beard; there is only another fist

He also gives a good interview and seems to be pretty healthy:

"I feel pretty good most days. I have a nurse that's here in the house to help out in case I need anything. And, like anyone, I have good days and bad days. But mostly, I'm feeling okay."

... And now that you've read this post, test your Karl Malden knowledge. For your pleasure: the Daily Karl Malden Quiz!

[Northwest Indiana Times]

Rap Community in Scurvy Danger From Lack of Pimp C

As we go on, we remember All the times we had together And as our lives change, from whatever You will still be, dead forever

Pimp C, one of the early progenitors of the Southern hip hop scene, was found dead in a Los Angeles hotel Tuesday at the age of 33. The death appears to be of natural causes, said the police.

Pimp C was best known for his cameo on Jay-Z's "Big Pimpin'," but also led off Three 6 Mafia's ode to getting high by drinking cough syrup, with the poetic "I'm trill working the wheel. A pimp, not a simp. Keep the dope fiends higher than the Goodyear blimp. We eat so many shrimp I got iodine poisoning."

The rapper formed Underground Kingz with partner-in-rhyme Bun B while the pair were in high school... Though they never enjoyed massive pop chart success, UGK's early CDs are considered landmarks for the then-burgeoning Texas hip-hop scene, which also featured the Geto Boys. Signed to a deal with Jive Records, they released "Too Hard to Swallow" in 1992, "Super Tight" two years later, and "Ridin' Dirty" in 1996, considered a rap classic.

Jay Z sang "We doin' big pimpin' up in NYC / It's just that Jigga-man, Pimp-C and B.U.N.B."

Sadly, Pimp-C's days of pimpin', big or otherwise, are relegated to Ho-ven now.

[AP]

Drawing Dead, Reese Forced to Fold

Poker legend David "Chip" Reese, who won three World Series of Poker bracelets, has died from symptoms of pneumonia. He was 56.

"I knew him for 35 years, I never saw him get mad or raise his voice," Doyle Brunson said. "He had the most even disposition of anyone I've ever met. He's certainly the best poker player that ever lived."

"We went to look for the Titanic. We went to look for Noah's Ark. We were two of the biggest suckers whenever it came to business, but we both had poker to fall back on," Brunson said. "Thank God we could play, so we always survived."

[Las Vegas Sun]

Ghost Writer Leaves with Pen in Hand

Elizabeth Hardwick helped found the New York Review of Books in 1963. She died at age 91 this past weekend.

Although she started out as a fiction writer, Hardwick received her greatest acclaim as a critic. Joyce Carol Oates likened her essays — long, playful, meditative, deeply informed — to those of Virginia Woolf. "Seduction and Betrayal," an analysis of such literary heroines as Hester Prynne of "The Scarlet Letter," became required reading for studies of women in fiction.

"She was a brilliant essayist, absolutely," Oates told The Associated Press on Tuesday. "She was a kind of genius in that difficult form, in which the personal and the critical, or cultural, were melded together in brilliant prose."

Hardwick's first novel was "The Ghostly Lover," which came out in 1945. We can't help but wonder if this is the end of the road for Hardwick's career, or just the beginning.

[AP]
[Forbes]

He Gave us 22 Minutes, We Give Him - His World

"Gather those rosebuds" to place at his grave... Larry Wachtel, "The Voice of Wall Street," has died today at the age of 77.

Wachtel provided daily stock market commentaries on 1010 WINS radio in New York for 33 years, and appeared frequently on the CBS Evening News. With his trademark Brooklyn accent, he had a knack for explaining complex concepts and helped translate finance for a broad audience:

Wachtel was a frequently quoted expert who specialized in translating Wall Street trends to laymen. In a hot market, he might tell investors to "break out the punch bowl and celebrate the activities of 'El Toro' the bull..." He once broadcasted of a volatile market. "This market has more moves than a Dr. J slam-dunk, and each one is a heart stopper."

Market Analysts Die on the 4th. Traffic and Weather correspondents should be careful on the 1's.

[New York Sun]

See No Evel, Hear No Evel, Speak No Evel

Scoring Update! The points change, death remains the same...

Evel Knievel's hard life killed him _ it just took longer than he or anyone else might have expected. The hard-living motorcycle daredevil, whose bone-breaking, rocket-powered jumps and stunts made him an international icon in the 1970s, died Friday. He was 69.

He had been in failing health for years, suffering from diabetes and pulmonary fibrosis, an incurable condition that scarred his lungs. He had undergone a liver transplant in 1999 after nearly dying of hepatitis C, likely contracted through a blood transfusion after one of his many spills.

He also suffered two strokes in recent years.Longtime friend and promoter Billy Rundle said Knievel had trouble breathing at his Clearwater condominium and died before an ambulance could get him to a hospital.

Congratulations and 15 points awarded to Beating a Dead Horse and Kraut's Picks. The Rosters and Standings have been updated.

[CBS News]