Thursday, March 13, 2008

Wait a Minute, That's Not Old Ma(rily)n Monroe...

Every once in a while, we here at Best Death Pool Ever will gather up our magnifying glasses, constable hats, trench coats, and scooby snacks and pack into the Mystery Van. (In case you were wondering, Fine Fellow is our Velma. Same bowl haircut.)

In today's episode, our gang helps psychiatrist Jack Hattem investigates a ghost that won't leave society alone, even popping up and spooking people in magazines (NSFW-ish): The ghost of Marilyn Monroe.

Jack Hattem has set out to answer a simple mystery: What really happened to Marilyn Monroe?

In true Mystery Van style, we gathered the clues.

Clue #1 - Toxic Relationships
Joe Dimaggio, Arthur Miller, and the Kennedy Brothers

(Hatten) came to the conclusion that, in the right circumstances, with the right people, a toxic relationship gives someone the power to coax suicide. "The perfect murder," he says, "with words and feelings as the weapon."
Clue #2 - The Case of the Faulty Garage Door
Decades later, (Hatten) would find echoes of (calls for help) in Monroe's death. What, he thought, would stop one or more of the people in Marilyn's life – a Kennedy, perhaps? – from convincing her to fake a suicide attempt for attention? And what would stop that "fake" suicide from going wrong, like the woman in the garage?
Like all good mysteries, this one might surprise you:
"I set out to prove it was a suicide. But I came to the wrong conclusion. But in a mystery, there's always a surprise."
So who killed Monroe? Hattem, in his book (SPOILER ALERT), helps us unmask the real killer.

Wait a minute... underneath this mask... it's not Marylin Monroe committing suicide... it's Bobby Kennedy!...and he would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn't for us meddling kids.

[O.C. Register]

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