Thursday, March 13, 2008

Yet Another Scandal For The Democratic Party!

Unless you're living under an Empire Club hooker, I'm sure you've come across the news of the wealthy lawyer turned hot shot Democratic politician, famous for his legislative abilities and for taking on big business, who was forced to step down in the wake of scandalous news.

We refer, of course, to former Ohio Senator Howard Metzenbaum, who was forced to step down from his post as a living person after it was revealed today that, despite his vocal senatorial efforts to keep people alive, he has, hypocritically, died. Worse yet, reports are surfacing that this Deathgate scandal may have been ninety years in the making, and that Metzenbaum may have spent obscene amounts of money to finance his life habit.

Metzenbaum is survived by his wife Shirley, surely the victim in this case. We wonder if she too, like all the wives before her, will be forced to stand by his side at the inevitable funeral conference.

Spitzer and Metzenbaum.
Not quite living up to expectations...


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